11.13.2009

Hey Trident, Shutup.

In case you're some type of mormon or something who isn't allowed to watch T.V., you've probably seen this new insulting, annoying, and racially intolerant trident commercial. If you haven't, here it is. But be careful, as it is very offensive




First of all, not only is the concept of paying a young women in gum a gross under compensation, it also completely invalidates the capitalist values our country has cherished since its birth. And what's more is the flagrant racism portrayed through out the commercial.

The Italian Chimney Sweep man; Because this man was so heavily caked in black coal I can hardly speculate on his actual race, but for the sake of civil rights I'm going to assume he is Italian. Although this is unforgivable enough, at least they didn't have him dressed in a pin stripe suit demanding trident gum in exchange for protection. (and by protection I mean him and his mafia buddies breaking all the store front windows twice a month)

The stereo typical black man working as a post office worker; Oh yeah, because black people are only good at working proletariat, labor orientated jobs. When was the last time you saw a black person advertising for a white collar company such as All State or Nike? Never, that's when. Why the reverends Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton are not up in arms about this is far beyond my realm of comprehension and shit.

The tired stereo type of an asian man working as a powerline worker; I don't even know why this stereo type exists in the first place. What's even more baffling is how trident thinks its ok to keep perpetuating it. Asians are just as likely to be powerline workers as every other race. All too often have I heard asian friends of mine being ridiculed by people saying things like, "haha, what are you, like some type of powerline worker?" or, "hey, were's your cherry picker? I think my transformers blown hahahahah!" Unbelievable.

The white man named mr. Jones; As a member of the white race, this one was particularly hard to deal with and probably the most personal. It seems like every where I go people refer to me as "Alex Jones". Not every white man is named Jones, Trident. We could be a Johnson, Stevenson, or even Smith. Where do you think the phrase "keeping up with the Joneses" came from? Racists, who assume that white people are the pinnacle of what a neighborhood dweller should be, and there for should be kept up with.


And that's Allstate's stand. What the hell is Trident's problem anyway? Gum was just fine before they decided to start laying different pieces on top of each other. If I wanted two different flavors of gum in my mouth I would just buy two differently flavored packs. That way if I just wanted one flavor, I wouldn't have my taste buds assaulted by both strawberry and citrus. Trident layers is basically a manage a toi going on my mouth. And that very concept offends me both as a Christian and a member of the Republican party. Sex should only be between a man and a women, not a man, a woman, and another woman. Ever, Period.

Its been said.

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